Did Jesus forgive Judas? No. He said Judas would have been better off not
being born. Did Jesus forgive the unrepentant scribes and Pharisees? No.
Did Jesus forgive the thieving money-changers in the temple? No. In anger,
he whipped them, driving them out.
What is your interpretation of the above passage? Why didn't Jesus say,
"you must forgive the unrepentant offender"?
The first thing Jesus commanded his disciples to preach was "Repent!" If
repentance is not necessary to be forgiven by God, then why should we
repent? If repentance is necessary to be forgiven by God, then why is
repentance not necessary before we forgive an offender? Do you think God
requires us to do something he's not prepared to do himself? Do you think
that by forgiving all unrepentant offenders, we are being more holy than
God, who will NOT forgive them?
By
David Smith.
Response A
I believe most people misunderstand Jesus’ teaching on forgiveness.
Let’s use as an example a recent story in the news—the Laci Peterson
case. Should Laci’s family unconditionally forgive their son-in-law,
Scott, if he is proven to have murdered their daughter and unborn
grandson? [Should the Iraqi mother whose four sons were all tortured and
murdered by Saddam Hussein’s regime unconditionally forgive his tormenters
and Saddam Hussein himself?]
For purposes of this paper, let’s assume the worst case: Assume an
unrepentant heart by the offender.
Common sense and moral clarity informs us that it would be sheer idiocy
to unconditionally forgive the perpetrators of these heinous crimes. God
wants us to hate evil, not love it. God created the human heart to swell
up in righteous anger and cry out to God for justice when confronting
wickedness of this magnitude.
So what did God mean by forgiveness of unrepentant sinners? Dave Smith
(above) suggests that there is inconsistency in God’s “thinking” on this
matter. But in my mind, the examples he listed seem perfectly consistent
with God’s character as I know it.
In the case of Scott Peterson—the crime is so heinous that, in the
human realm, it immediately rolls over into the area of civil law for the
courts to mete out appropriate penalty. Spiritually, in the case of his
unrepentant heart, only prayer and God’s grace have issue.
But what does forgiveness mean for the victim? In his case, after the
(necessary) anger and broken heart, by God’s grace comes healing.
Forgiveness is a necessary (and natural) part of healing when it is a
RELEASE of anger and hurt, but it need not be an acceptance of nor an
embracing of the person/s who have hurt you. You cannot (MUST not) give
your trust to someone who has betrayed you when he has not sincerely
repented of his betrayal. This is a complete misunderstanding of
forgiveness. Indeed, it is a travesty on the same order as appeasing evil
and cannot bring true peace to the heart of the victim or the offender.
However, in the Pederson case, releasing the hurt and rage—giving it to
God—means that Laci’s family have decided that the evil that has gripped
Scott will claim no more victims from their family. It is the triumph of
faith over fear. It is the triumph of good over evil. It is the triumph
of God over Satan. This is the forgiveness God requires of us all.
Forgiveness is the medicine we must swallow in order to get well. It
might not taste good going down, but it begins the healing process. By
the grace of God, Laci’s family can forgive Scott at the same time that
they can “wrestle” with him and even favor the death penalty as justice
for Laci.
But what does it mean to “wrestle” with Scott? It means to hate with
everything in us the evil that has hold of him: “For we do not wrestle
against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers,
against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of
wickedness in the heavenly places.” (Eph. 6:12) Surely Scott is the
greatest victim of all, for Satan has ensnared him, has confounded him,
and his soul is in the gravest of dangers. If we could but part the
heavenly curtains, perhaps we would see chaotic, desperate warfare for the
possession of his soul. Perhaps that battle has already been won. We
cannot know. Again, we are called to the faith of a child. We can do
nothing but pray for Scott—that his heart would yet break and he would
enter too into that most wondrous of all processes—the broken, repentant
heart and the subsequent knowledge of God’s love and forgiveness.
But without a repentant heart there can be no engaging in the process
of forgiveness by the victim with the transgressor, for the act of
forgiving means absolutely nothing to the transgressor’s unrepentant
heart. Forgiveness then becomes a matter between the victim and God.
Forgiving Scott means that Laci’s family has trusted God to write the
script to the rest of their story. “Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says
the Lord.” (Rom. 12:19) Does that mean that God is telling us to get out
of the way and let HIM have the pleasure of revenge? No, it means that in
our infinite unknowingness, we cannot comprehend the meaning of vengeance
and it must therefore belong to God. Jesus exacted vengeance in a most
unexpected way when he conquered Satan in an extraordinary display of love
on the cross. We do not know God’s plans for Scott. We can only move
delicately out of the way recognizing that forgiveness is a most
mysteriously necessary, intimate—indeed sacred—matter between God, victim
and offender.
P.S. Reading this paper made me realize how little I know about
forgiveness and prompted me to call a very wise woman I have known for
several years. I consider her a hands-on "expert" on forgiveness--in the
sense that several years ago she chose to forgive and reconcile with
someone who had hurt her very badly. In the course of our conversation,
she revealed that some issues regarding this hurtful situation have
returned and that she has been praying for guidance. We had a lovely
dialogue and the end of our call, she told me that our conversation had
been a timely answer to prayer and had helped her immensely.
By Diane Ottlinger
Response B
Here are some comments on the questions raised. I will
first quote the issues raised and then give my comments.
1. Peter, inspired by the Holy Spirit, ministered death, not
forgiveness, to unrepentant liars Ananias and Sapphira. Comments:
Peter did not minister death, he was just the instrument God used to
show that lies against the Holy Spirit have serious results and
consequences. There is a judgment at the end and all evil is not
automatically forgiven. God administers that.
2. Paul, filled with the Holy Spirit, ministered blindness, not
forgiveness, to Elymas the sorcerer. Comments on Acts 13:6-12: Elymas
was a false prophet and his temporary physical blindness just
reflected his real spiritual blindness. God used the temporary
blindness of Elymas to lead Sergius Paulus to repentance and thus
forgiveness. Jesus judges all people at His second coming, but some
are judged ahead of time.
Acts 13:11 And now, behold, the hand of the
Lord is upon thee, and thou shalt be blind, not seeing the sun for a
season. And immediately there fell on him a mist and a darkness; and
he went about seeking some to lead him by the hand.
3. Did Jesus forgive Judas? No. He said Judas would have been better off
not being born. Did Jesus forgive the unrepentant scribes and Pharisees?
No. Did Jesus forgive the thieving money-changers in the temple? No. In
anger, he whipped them, driving them out. Comments: Evil has its
consequences. God who knows all can judge. We cannot. We can only
forgive.
4.
Mat 18:17 And if he shall neglect to hear them, tell [it] unto the
church: but if he neglect to hear the church, let him be unto thee as an
heathen man and a
publican. Why didn't Jesus say, "you must
forgive the unrepentant offender"? Comments: A heathen and a publican
still needs to be forgiven. Jesus chose not to define forgiveness nor to
discuss forgiveness as a process.
5. If Jesus really preached the unconditional forgiveness
of unrepentant sinners, it seems he was no longer practicing what he
preached by the time Revelation was written.
Rev 2:4
Nevertheless I have somewhat against thee, because thou hast left thy
first love.
He then goes on to threaten punishment unless repentance was
forthcoming.
Remember therefore from whence thou art
fallen, and repent, and do the first works; or else I will come unto
thee quickly, and will remove thy candlestick out of his place, except
thou repent.Comments:
Jesus as God is also the judge. As that he is very different from us.
We cannot judge, we can only forgive. Jesus will at the end bring
justice to all.
6. The first thing Jesus commanded his disciples to preach was "Repent!"
If repentance is not necessary to be forgiven by God, then why should we
repent? If repentance is necessary to be forgiven by God, then why is
repentance not necessary before we forgive an offender? Do you think God
requires us to do something he's not prepared to do himself? Do you
think that by forgiving all unrepentant offenders, we are being more
holy than God, who will NOT forgive them?
Comments: There is a big difference between being forgiven by God and
being forgiven by an other person. God's big job is to bring justice to
all, ours is to love all. We can not on an individual basis bring
justice by selecting whom to forgive and whom not to forgive. We as
individuals are asked not to judge. The state or the church can judge
and enforce the law. Also, for mankind, un-forgiveness is an excessive
burden that man is not made to bear. Let God be God and let God do his
work. I have to do mine and be freed from the evil that un-forgiveness
would burden me with.
By Rudolf Klimes, PhD
Response C
I've been grappling with the issue of forgiveness to someone seemingly
unrepentant for his wrong doing since I was six years old.
David Smith answered one part of forgiveness with excellent references
from the New Testament. "Should a person who was wronged forgive an
unrepentant perpetrator?"
It is true that God did not forgive unrepentant offenders. God is God.
He knows our hearts perfectly. Those that repent receive his
forgiveness. Those who do not repent of their sins after the Holy Spirit
strives with them are not deserving of God's mercy. But only God has that
knowledge.
In the instances when Peter pronounced a curse of death upon Ananias and
Sapphira and Paul pronounced a curse of blindness upon Elymas, both were
"inspired" by the Holy Spirit.
As for persons in the church the procedure mentioned in Matthew 18:17 is
valid. If the offender is not repentant, for the sake of his own
emotional health, the offended must forgive and "let it go." Otherwise,
the deed and/or the event will keep festering, using
up the energy of the offended and "eating away" at his emotions not giving
him any peace of mind.
In today's world, there are many people who have been ill-treated with no
repentance forthcoming from the wrongdoer. The former has a choice of
forgiving or not forgiving the latter. If the ill-treated chooses not to
forgive, he continues to carry that emotional
baggage with him throughout his life. Every time he thinks of the
incident, he will feel anger, hurt, resentment or other negative emotions
which certainly are not signs of peace and happiness. If by God's grace,
he is able to forgive the unrepentant, the whole
burden is lifted off and he can continue his duties with a happy heart.
When we were children, our Christian mother taught us to forgive our
father each time he mistreated us. Though at times it seemed unfair and
some of us harbored the wrong longer than others, it was for me the most
therapeutic procedure. It helped me throughout my life to have an
attitude of forgiveness for any ill treatment I received. For me this was
the key to loving my "enemies."
By Anna Klimes, EdD
Response D
As I see it, there are two
initial issues that should be addressed. The first is forgiveness vs.
reconciliation vs. pardon. The second is the sovereignty of God.
Finally, the specific questions will be explored.
Forgiveness vs.
Reconciliation vs. Pardon
Forgiveness
Colloquially, the word
forgiveness often includes reconciliation and pardon. In “forgive” as
aphiemi can refer to letting go, letting be, disregarding, giving up
and keeping no longer. “Forgive” as charizomai can mean to
show one's self gracious, kind, benevolent, or to pardon. “Forgive” as
aphesis is more a release from imprisonment, a pardon and a remission
of penalty. There are overlaps in usage, and
the word translated “forgiveness” may imply singly or any combination of
forgiveness, reconciliation and pardon. However, forgiveness,
specifically, is a separate entity from reconciliation or pardon.
Forgiveness is a unilateral
gift given by the one who has been offended. It is the forgiveness
recommended by Paul in Ephesians as discussed in
Forgiveness Therapy: Healing the Wrongs, F101.:
The 5 Steps in Forgiveness
according to Ephesians 4:31-32:
Acknowledge anger
and bar revenge:
·
A. Let all bitterness, wrath and
anger
·
B. And clamor and slander
(and thought of revenge) be put away from you, along with all malice.
Consider the offender's perspective, accept the hurt, extend compassion:
·
C. Be kind to one another,
(while considering the other's perspective),
·
D. Gentle and tender-hearted
(and accepting the hurt),
E. forgiving each other just as God in Christ has forgiven you
(with compassion).
Simply put, forgiveness is
love, as is discussed in
Forgiveness Skills: One Step at a Time, F301.
This is the forgiveness Jesus spoke about:
Matthew 5
39But
I tell you, Do not resist an evil person. If someone strikes you on the
right cheek, turn to him the other also. 40And if someone wants
to sue you and take your tunic, let him have your cloak as well…
43"You
have heard that it was said, 'Love your neighbor and hate your
enemy.' 44But I tell you: Love your enemies and
pray for those who persecute you, 45that you may be sons of
your Father in heaven.
Reconciliation
Reconciliation, in human
relations, is not always possible or desired. Reconciliation is the
restoration of a relationship, and REQUIRES a willingness of both
parties. Reconciliation cannot occur unless the one offended has
forgiven, given up anger and revenge, and strives towards acting in
kindness, gentleness and love. It requires action on the part of the
offender, as is covered at
Forgiveness Therapy: Healing the Wrongs, F101.:
Five
Steps in Asking for Reconciliation
The offender, that is the person who has
caused the hurt, has no direct part in the initial forgiveness that the
forgiver experiences. His part comes in the next level which is
reconciliation. Reconciliation is not always possible. The offender's five
steps in asking for the gift of forgiveness (according to R. Klimes, PhD)
are:
·
A. Acknowledge your guilt
in contributing to the clearly identified specific offense(s).
·
B. Bar repetition of the
offense. Declare that you will not do it again.
·
C. Consider the offended
person's perspective. Try to understand his/her attitude and behavior.
·
D. Declare your apology and
sorrow for the hurt you caused. Say "I am sorry for..."
·
E. Extend compassion and
good acts to the offended person. Make it up, if you can.
Without these steps,
there usually cannot be forgiveness and reconciliation.
Pardon
Pardon, as also discussed
Forgiveness Therapy: Healing the Wrongs, F101.:
“…is
a transaction, often a legal one, that releases the injuring person from
the consequences of his or her injurious actions. In pardoning, the
pardoner takes on or blots out the loss caused by the damaging situation.
In many publications, the term forgiveness is used when pardoning may be
more accurate.”
Again, in human
relations, pardon may not always be possible (especially with the legal
system’s involvement) or desired.
The Sovereignty
of God
In the
relationship of humans to their Creator God, man has offended God. Man has
damaged the relationship.
Romans 3
22This righteousness from God comes through faith in Jesus
Christ to all who believe. There is no difference, 23for all
have sinned and fall short of the glory of God
Romans 5
12Therefore, just as sin entered the world through one man, and
death through sin, and in this way death came to all men, because all
sinned-- 13for before the law was given, sin was in the world.
God has ALREADY FORGIVEN
man his offense. God loves.
Ephesians 4
31Get
rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with
every form of malice. 32Be kind and compassionate to one
another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.
Psalm 36
7 How priceless is your unfailing love!
Psalm 66
20 Praise be to God,
who has not rejected my prayer
or withheld his love from me!
Romans 8
38For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither
angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers,
39neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation,
will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus
our Lord.
Nehemiah 9
17 But you are a forgiving God, gracious and compassionate,
slow to anger and abounding in love.
God is ready and willing
for reconciliation.
1 Timothy 2
3This is good, and pleases God our Savior, 4who
wants all men to be saved and to come to a knowledge of the truth.
Through faith, accepting
His Gift, are able to be reconciled.
Colossians 1
21Once you were alienated from God and were enemies in your
minds because of your evil behavior. 22But now he
has reconciled you by Christ's physical body through death to present you
holy in his sight, without blemish and free from accusation-- 23if
you continue in your faith, established and firm, not moved from the hope
held out in the gospel.
2 Corinthians 5
16So from now on we regard no one from a worldly point of view.
Though we once regarded Christ in this way, we do so no longer. 17Therefore,
if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new
has come! 18All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself
through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation: 19that
God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting men's
sins against them. And he has committed to us the message of
reconciliation.
Our relationship with God
is different than our human relationships. Contrary to human-human
relationships where reconciliation may occur yet the consequences of an
injurious action may not be pardoned, from God’s standpoint reconciliation
and pardon occur in tandem. God has accomplished a method of this
reconciliation/pardon (salvation through faith in the atoning death and
resurrection of Christ).
Romans 5
8But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we
were still sinners, Christ died for us.
9Since we have now been justified by his blood, how much more
shall we be saved from God's wrath through him! 10For if, when
we were God's enemies, we were reconciled to him through the death of his
Son, how much more, having been reconciled, shall we be saved through his
life! 11Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through
our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.
Isaiah 55
6 Seek the LORD while he may be found;
call on him while he is near.
7 Let the wicked forsake his way
and the evil man his thoughts.
Let him turn to the LORD , and he will have mercy on him,
and to our God, for he will freely pardon.
God tries to get us to understand forgiveness,
reconciliation and pardon (and the consequences of no reconciliation and
therefore no pardon) through examples in scriptures.
Luke 15
20So he got up and went to his father.
"But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled
with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and
kissed him.
21"The son said to him, 'Father, I have sinned against heaven
and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son. '
22"But the father said to his servants, 'Quick! Bring the best
robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet.
Nehemiah 9
16 But they and our fathers dealt proudly, and hardened their
necks, and hearkened not to thy commandments,
17 And refused to obey, neither were mindful of thy wonders
that thou didst among them; but hardened their necks, and in their
rebellion appointed a captain to return to their bondage: but thou art a
God ready to pardon, gracious and merciful, slow to anger, and of great
kindness, and forsookest them not.
Numbers 14
13 Moses said to the LORD …. 17 "Now may the Lord's
strength be displayed, just as you have declared: 18 'The LORD
is slow to anger, abounding in love and forgiving sin and rebellion. Yet
he does not leave the guilty unpunished; he punishes the children for the
sin of the fathers to the third and fourth generation.' 19 In
accordance with your great love, forgive the sin of these people, just as
you have pardoned them from the time they left Egypt until now."
20 The LORD replied, "I have forgiven them, as you asked.
21 Nevertheless, as surely as I live and as surely as the glory of
the LORD fills the whole earth, 22 not one of the men who saw
my glory and the miraculous signs I performed in Egypt and in the desert
but who disobeyed me and tested me ten times- 23 not one of
them will ever see the land I promised on oath to their forefathers. No
one who has treated me with contempt will ever see it.
Genesis 50
16 So they sent word to Joseph, saying, "Your father left these
instructions before he died: 17 'This is what you are to say to
Joseph: I ask you to forgive your brothers the sins and the wrongs they
committed in treating you so badly.' Now please forgive the sins of the
servants of the God of your father." When their message came to him,
Joseph wept.
Genesis 19
23 By the time Lot reached Zoar, the sun had risen over the
land. 24 Then the LORD rained down burning sulfur on Sodom and
Gomorrah-from the LORD out of the heavens. 25 Thus he overthrew
those cities and the entire plain, including all those living in the
cities-and also the vegetation in the land.
Specific Questions Raised
1.
Peter, inspired by the Holy
Spirit, ministered death, not forgiveness, to unrepentant liars Ananias
and Sapphira.
The actual text says:
Acts 5
1Now a man named Ananias, together with his wife Sapphira, also
sold a piece of property. 2With his wife's full knowledge he
kept back part of the money for himself, but brought the rest and put it
at the apostles' feet.
3Then Peter said, "Ananias, how is it that Satan has so filled
your heart that you have lied to the Holy Spirit and have kept for
yourself some of the money you received for the land? 4Didn't
it belong to you before it was sold? And after it was sold, wasn't the
money at your disposal? What made you think of doing such a thing? You
have not lied to men but to God."
5When Ananias heard this, he fell down and died.
Peter did not minister
death. Ananias (and Sapphira) had been forgiven by God, as are all of
us. However, it appears that God in his wisdom knew they were not willing
for reconciliation and they became examples of the final consequence of
being and remaining against God.
2.
Paul, filled with the Holy
Spirit, ministered blindness, not forgiveness, to Elymas the sorcerer.
Acts 13:11 And now,
behold, the hand of the Lord is upon thee, and thou shalt be blind, not
seeing the sun for a season. And immediately there fell on him a mist and
a darkness; and he went about seeking some to lead him by the hand.
The entire story goes:
Acts 13
4The two of them, sent on their way by the Holy Spirit, went
down to Seleucia and sailed from there to Cyprus. 5When they
arrived at Salamis, they proclaimed the word of God in the Jewish
synagogues. John was with them as their helper.
6They traveled through the whole island until they came to
Paphos. There they met a Jewish sorcerer and false prophet named
Bar-Jesus, 7who was an attendant of the proconsul, Sergius
Paulus. The proconsul, an intelligent man, sent for Barnabas and Saul
because he wanted to hear the word of God. 8But Elymas the
sorcerer (for that is what his name means) opposed them and tried to turn
the proconsul from the faith. 9Then Saul, who was also called
Paul, filled with the Holy Spirit, looked straight at Elymas and said,
10"You are a child of the devil and an enemy of everything that
is right! You are full of all kinds of deceit and trickery. Will you never
stop perverting the right ways of the Lord? 11Now the hand of
the Lord is against you. You are going to be blind, and for a time you
will be unable to see the light of the sun."
12Immediately mist and darkness came over him, and he groped
about, seeking someone to lead him by the hand. When the proconsul saw
what had happened, he believed, for he was amazed at the teaching about
the Lord.
Once again, the event was
an example for us, guided directly by God, against a committed false
prophet who was working directly against God’s will. No better evidence
could be given of his unwillingness for reconciliation than being deemed a
child of the devil, an enemy of all that is right, full of all kinds of
deceit. The Spirit’s lesson of spiritual blindness typified by physical
blindness resulted in the belief (therefore reconciliation) of the
proconsul.
3.
Did Jesus forgive Judas? No.
He said Judas would have been better off not being born.
Christ loved, and forgave
those who crucified Him.
Luke 23
34Jesus said, "Father, forgive them, for they do not know what
they are doing."
Again, the issue is not
forgiveness, but rather it is an unrepentant who is therefore unwilling to
reconcile.
Luke 22
3Then Satan entered Judas, called Iscariot, one of the Twelve.
4And Judas went to the chief priests and the officers of the
temple guard and discussed with them how he might betray Jesus.
John 13
27As soon as Judas took the bread, Satan entered into him.
Anyone that allows Satan to
indwell is truly worse of than if he hadn’t been born. It is not a matter
of forgiveness, just a statement of fact resulting from Judas’ choice.
4.
Did Jesus forgive the unrepentant scribes and Pharisees? No.
Christ loved all of Jerusalem, including the scribes
and the Pharisees.
Luke 19
39Some
of the Pharisees in the crowd said to Jesus, "Teacher, rebuke your
disciples!"
40"I tell you," he replied, "if they keep quiet, the stones
will cry out."
41As he approached Jerusalem and saw the city, he wept over it
42and said, "If you, even you, had only known on this day what
would bring you peace--but now it is hidden from your eyes.
Even though nearly all of the texts regarding the
Pharisees show their hatred and plotting against Christ, He harbored no
anger towards them individually.
Luke 7
36Now one of the Pharisees invited Jesus to have dinner with
him, so he went to the Pharisee's house and reclined at the table.
5.
Did Jesus forgive the
thieving money-changers in the temple? No. In anger, he whipped them,
driving them out.
John 2
14In the temple courts he found men selling cattle, sheep and
doves, and others sitting at tables exchanging money. 15So he
made a whip out of cords, and drove all from the temple area, both sheep
and cattle; he scattered the coins of the money changers and overturned
their tables. 16To those who sold doves he said, "Get these out
of here! How dare you turn my Father's house into a market!"
He did not whip them, He
drove them out. He forgave them just as He did those who crucified Him,
but they were not interested in acknowledging their error. His “anger”,
His righteous indignation was against the desecration of Gods Temple. He
could not allow that dishonor to continue – an example of the inability of
sin to stand in the presence of a Holy God.
6.
Mat 18:17 And if he shall neglect to hear them, tell [it] unto the
church: but if he neglect to hear the church, let him be unto thee as an
heathen man and a publican.
What is
your interpretation of the above passage? Why didn't Jesus say, "you must
forgive the unrepentant offender"?
The entire text reads:
Matthew 18
15"If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault,
just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your
brother over. 16But if he will not listen, take one or two
others along, so that 'every matter may be established by the testimony of
two or three witnesses.' 17If he refuses to listen to them,
tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church,
treat him as you would a pagan or a tax collector.
The act of going to the offender, in private,
attempting to get him to listen to you, and if successful having won him
over is a classic example of trying to facilitate reconciliation.
Forgiveness (the giving up of anger and revenge, being kind and
tender-hearted, respecting privacy) has already occurred. Biblically
forgiveness is taught as something that should be done not only to friends
and neighbors but to enemies as well.
Matthew 5
43"You have heard that it was said, 'Love your neighbor
and hate your enemy.' 44But I tell you: Love your enemies
and pray for those who persecute you, 45that you may be
sons of your Father in heaven.
But attempts at reconciliation are not possible while
one of the parties maintains his enemy role. Reconciliation is therefore
taught as something that “brothers” should attempt to do.
Matthew 5
23"Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and
there remember that your brother has something against you, 24leave
your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your
brother; then come and offer your gift.
When a brother who has offended you, a brother you
have already forgiven, is unwilling to consider reconciliation after
repeated attempts, it is best not to associate with him. Since his
spirit, which seems not to be aligned with God’s Spirit, would be a
continuing spiritually unhealthy influence.
5.
If Jesus really preached the
unconditional forgiveness of unrepentant sinners, it seems he was no
longer practicing what he preached by the time Revelation was written.
Rev
2:4 Nevertheless I have somewhat against
thee, because thou hast left thy first love.
He then
goes on to threaten punishment unless repentance was forthcoming.
Remember therefore from
whence thou art fallen, and repent, and do the first works; or else I will
come unto thee quickly, and will remove thy candlestick out of his place,
except thou repent.
The entire text reads:
Revelation 2
1"To the angel of the church in Ephesus write:
These are the words of him who holds the seven stars in his right hand and
walks among the seven golden lampstands: 2I know your deeds,
your hard work and your perseverance. I know that you cannot tolerate
wicked men, that you have tested those who claim to be apostles but are
not, and have found them false. 3You have persevered and have
endured hardships for my name, and have not grown weary. 4Yet I
hold this against you: You have forsaken your first love. 5Remember
the height from which you have fallen! Repent and do the things you did at
first. If you do not repent, I will come to you and remove your lampstand
from its place.
The church at Ephesus had persevered, and had not
grown weary, but they had lost the love found in Christ.
Ephesians 3
A Prayer for the Ephesians
14For this reason I kneel before the Father, 15from
whom his whole family in heaven and on earth derives its name.
16I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you
with power through his Spirit in your inner being, 17so that
Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being
rooted and established in love, 18may have power, together with
all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love
of Christ, 19and to know this love that surpasses
knowledge--that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of
God.
If they could not find it again, their
light/candlestick/lampstand would go out. It has nothing to do with
forgiveness. It has everything to do with a relationship.
8. The first thing Jesus commanded his disciples
to preach was "Repent!" If repentance is not necessary to be forgiven by
God, then why should we repent? If repentance is necessary to be forgiven
by God, then why is repentance not necessary before we forgive an
offender?
Repentance by the offender is NOT necessary to be
forgiven by God. Reconciliation requires repentance – the acknowledgement
of having offended. See
Forgiveness Therapy: Healing the Wrongs, F101.:
Five Steps in Asking for Reconciliation
The offender, that is the person who has caused the hurt, has no direct
part in the initial forgiveness that the forgiver experiences. His part
comes in the next level which is reconciliation. Reconciliation is not
always possible. The offender's five steps in asking for the gift of
forgiveness (according to R. Klimes, PhD) are:
·
A. Acknowledge your guilt
in contributing to the clearly identified specific offense(s).
·
B. Bar repetition of the
offense. Declare that you will not do it again.
·
C. Consider the offended
person's perspective. Try to understand his/her attitude and behavior.
·
D. Declare your apology and
sorrow for the hurt you caused. Say "I am sorry for..."
·
E. Extend compassion and
good acts to the offended person. Make it up, if you can.
Without these steps, there usually cannot be forgiveness and
reconciliation.
6. Do you think God requires us to do something
he's not prepared to do himself? Do you think that by forgiving all
unrepentant offenders, we are being more holy than God, who will NOT
forgive them?
God
not only is prepared to forgive; he HAS forgiven us all. In like manner,
we should forgive those who offend us. Our offender’s next step then, if
he is willing, is reconciliation; as is our next step, if we are willing,
with our God.
By Jay Draeger, MD
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